What is the proper way to send large amounts of solicited mail when using Google Apps [closed]

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We use Google Apps (Gmail) to send and receive all of our email. Our application, which has grown in popularity over the years, sends email to its users per their request. It's not spam, it's important email they ask for.

Gmail (rightfully so) restricts the number of emails you can send. We get around this by queuing our mail and sending it at a slower pace, which works most of the time. We also use multiple email addresses to allow ourselves to send more than the 100-500 email limit.

Is there a way we can send email from our own SMTP server and follow all the proper rules and etiquette to not get flagged as SPAM? This way we can avoid GMail's restrictions.

Are there any good guides for setting up your own email SMTP server to send mail to avoid being flagged as 开发者_StackOverflow中文版SPAM?

Also, before anyone suggest that I use a 3rd party email sender, I need to be able to send these emails using Java.

(if this question is more appropriate on serverfault, I'm happy to move it)

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I'd recommend http://sendgrid.com

It's quick to set up, well-priced, and they do much of the work to ensure your mail is deliverable (assuming you aren't sending spam in the first place, of course).

Oh and just to clarify, while Sendgrid is a 3rd party service, it's essential just a SMTP server in the cloud, so you should be able to switch from gmail to sendgrid by simply pointing at sendgrid's SMTP server instead of gmail's.